Quotes from the anime/ manga series, both funny and touching. XD

[Yuki hits Shigure over the head with his bag.]
Yuki:  Shame on you, getting closer and closer.
Shigure:  That really hurt, that bag! Are you carrying dictionaries in there or what?
Yuki:  Yes. Two of them.

[After Tohru is harassed by the Yuki fan club]
Hana:  With Poison Electro-Magnetic waves, I will "BIIIIIIIIIIIII---"
Tohru:  I'm saved.
Uo:  Hanajima, don't use Electro-Magnetic waves for real, okay?

Uo:  Are you still staying with your relatives on your father's side?
Tohru:  *gulp* Yes!
Uo:  Are you getting enough to eat?! They're not cheating you out of your part-time job pay, are they?!
Tohru:  [thinking] I can't tell them. If she knew I was living in a tent, Uo-chan would be furious. She might go to my relative's house with a bike and attack it.

Tohru:  I lost my home again.
Shigure:  Is it painful?
Tohru:  No, I know of more painful things.
Shigure:  Like what?
Tohru:  I didn't say, "Please go and come back safely," the morning my mother got killed in the accident. I had a small test, so I was up until dawn studying. I couldn't wake up after, and so only that morning, I couldn't say it. I'd always said it. But only that morning... I was thinking of quitting high school and start working. But my mother had said, "I only graduated from middle school but I've always wanted to become a high school student. I want you to be different from me and have a high school life." It was at that moment I realized that she was working for my sake. But for such a mother like her, I didn't say, "Please go and come back safely," even to her back as she was going out to work. So at least high school, the high school that my mother desperately wanted me to attend, I want to graduate. That is my goal. I won't lose to a fever like this.

Shigure:  High school girls! High school girls! High school girls are coming! Ah, I wonder what kind of girls Tohru-kun's friends are?
Kyou:  A Yankee and a psychic.

Kyou:  She's not someone who cares about things like that.
Yuki:  Honda-san is someone who perfectly understands other people's hearts.

Shigure:  Oh! Playing cards?! Can I join you?! Let me, let me!
Uo:  Hey Mr. Novelist, you any good?
Shigure:  I might not look like it, but they used to call me the "Grayson of Cards."
Tohru:  What, really?! Amazing!
Uo:  It's obviously a lie.

Kyou:  Hey, this stand is crooked.
Classmate1:  Don't worry about something so trivial, Nekozuki.
Classmate2:  Yeah, Nekozuki.
Classmate3:  As long as it's not broken, Nekozuki.
Kyou:  What's with you guys?! Calling me Nekozuki! Are you making fun of me?!
Classmate3:  We got it. You've got a rough mouth, but inside, you're just a nice guy who likes animals. Right?
Kyou:  Listen, you! I don't care for any animals!
Uo:  He's always the noisiest one when he arrives.

[Kyou is surrounded by cats.]
Tohru:  Ah! Hello, Mr. Cat! So cute! Cats really like you, don't they?
Kyou:  Who cares about that! They just keep following me. Dogs to the dog, and mice to the mouse.
Tohru:  Wow, it sounds like fun!
Kyou:  You think it's fun?! Once I was in the mountains with Kagura, and we got surrounded by so many boars, I thought I was gonna get eaten!!

Kana:  That's it! Can I ask you a question? When snow melts, what does it become?
Hatori:  It'll become water, of course.
Kana:  Wrong! It becomes spring! I love spring the most.

Hatori:  What do you think snow becomes in winter?
Tohru:  What? Um... Let's see... It becomes spring, doesn't it? No matter how cold it is now, spring will come for sure. Amazing, isn't it? Snow always melts away. Always. I love spring the most.

Hatori:  What brings you here?
Shigure:  I was worried that you might be scaring Tohru-kun or something. A novelist's instinct, you know?
Hatori:  Don't lie. You came to check on the New Year preparations, didn't you?
Shigure:  Ahh, people always envy the genius.

Shigure:  Oh yeah, Tohru-kun! Did Ha-san tell you what animal he was?
Hatori:  Shigure. I'll tell the publishing industry every single one of your embarrassing stories since you were four.
Shigure:  Got it. I won't mention it again.

Shigure:  I'm about to wet my pants! *opens bathroom door*
Hana:  Didn't you see the cleaning sign?
Shigure:  Ah, sorry sorry.
Hana:  I'm cleaning this right now.
Shigure:  I'll do it really quick...
Hana:  They say you can understand how an electric wave flows by watching how water flows. There is a reason for that. You know that 60% of the human body is composed of water, don't you? In other words, minus the flesh, humans are only water. Despite that, I think people underestimate miso too much. The real fault is being inexperienced by having an obsession with eating...
Shigure:  *slams door*

[Mit-chan is Shigure's editor]
Mit-chan:  A demon... a devil... the hell of a bloody lake... the hell of needles... blank papers... double suicide... death by burning...
Uo:  Hey. Here, the writer guy asked me to give this to you.
Mit-chan:  What? *opens manuscript* If it was already done, he should have said so. Why?! *starts wailing*

[Talking about Tohru]
Kyou:  A while ago, she left her door wide open.
Yuki:  Don't tell me you went inside!
Kyou:  Of course not! I just saw from the outside.
Yuki:  Honda-san is clumsy after all. This morning she fell down the stairs again.
Kyou:  She sometimes bumps into a perfectly fine wall. She's definitely one of those absent-minded types.
Yuki:  Stop being so blunt!
Shigure:  You guys. Will you please stop talking like a bunch of pregnant ladies?

[Again, talking about Tohru]
Shigure:  Ah, now that I think of it, the evening paper said that a robbery occurred nearby. I heard the suspect hasn't been caught yet.
Kyou:  [Thinking] Oh no! She's dumb enough to welcome the robber in at the gate!
Yuki:  [Thinking] She'd probably bring some tea on a platter and even listen to his whole life story!

Shigure:  Hey! The bath is open! Yuki-kun, your turn!
Yuki:  Not today.
Shigure:  What, no way! You're not going to wash?! How filthy!
Yuki:  I'm going to hang him upside down from a ceiling one day.

Yuki:  What about your school?
Haru:  I left last Sunday. Before I realized it, I was on a path I couldn't recognize. When I came back to my senses, three days had already passed.
Yuki:  Just be honest and say you got lost.

Haru:  Why you, when did you become such a scaredy-cat?!
Kyou:  Man, you're really annoying when you become "Black!"
Haru:  Shut up! If you keep yapping, I'll take that girl, too!
Kyou:  Huh?! What are you talking about?!
Haru:  I'll do this, that, and even it with her!
Kyou:  Wh--What is this octopus head talking about? He even forgot about the time I took him to the bathroom when he got lost looking for it! Really, not a thread of charm is left on him when he's "Black." Who brought him out anyway? Ah, it was me. But what does he mean by "this, that, and it?" I don't quite understand, but why bring a girl into this? She has nothing to do with this! Of course. She has nothing to do with this! A girl has nothing to do with a fight between men! Absolutely nothing, right?! Somehow it pisses me off!

[Tohru is passing out chocolates on Valentine's Day.]
Tohru:  Here!
Yuki:  Thank you.
Tohru:  And here, for Shigure-san.
Shigure:  Eh? You have one for me, too?
Yuki:  You were going to ask for one anyway, weren't you?
Tohru:  After all, I am being a burden.
Shigure:  Ah, no you're not being a burden at all. But still, I'm so happy! My tired body and soul shall be healed by Tohru-kun's chocolate of love!

Kagura:  Well then, I'll visit again, okay?
Kyou:  It's fine  if you don't!
Kagura:  You know, Haru-chan told me. That Kyou-kun and Yun-chan are getting along better. That if you two get to know each other better, you might even become friends. If that happens... I'll be happy, too.

Shigure:  Here, Ha-san! From me, a Valentine chocolate!
Hatori:  ... *slams door in his face*
Shigure:  I'm sorry, it was a lie. It's from Tohru-kun. Please let me in...
Hatori:  Idiot.

Uo:  Don't worry, Hanajima. There is an idiot who certainly stands worse than you.
Kyou:  Hey, you're not referring to me, are you?
Uo:  Huh? Of course I'm talking about you.
Kyou:  I never had a tutoring session, nor had my parents called!!
Classmate:  Kyon-Kyon is actually pretty smart.
Kyou:  Hey! What do you mean by "actually"?!
Uo:  Heh, but you suck at challenges.
Kyou:  None of your business!
Uo:  Haha... you're one of those, aren't you? The kind of idiot who studies hard but still screws it up by studying the wrong parts for the exam, right?
Kyou:  I'm gonna squash you.

Momiji:  Ah! You look so refreshed after a bath, Kyou~!
Kyou:  Something about that whiny voice of yours really gets on my nerves.
Momiji:  Wah~! Kyou is picking on me~!
Tohru:  Momiji-kun, aren't you hungry?
Momiji:  I am~!
Kyou:  That's what I mean about getting on my nerves.
Momiji:  Wahhh~~~

Momiji:  March 14 is White Day so I'm taking Tohru to a hot spring for my present!
Tohru:  Eeeehhhhh?!
Momiji:  Titled, "A Happy Hot Spring Trip for Me and Tohru Together!"
Shigure:  You don't have to title it.

Tohru:  A hot spring. To be invited to such a glamorous place... It's too extravagant for me! I don't deserve it!
Shigure:  Um, listen, Tohru-kun, it's a hot spring... it's not some place like Paris.

Ookami:  Tohru-san's room will be next to the bochans' room.
Kyou:  Hey! Does this mean I'm going to be in the same room as damn Yuki?
Ookami:  You two still have a bad relationship, I see. But don't worry, you can separate the room with a Fusuma.
Kyou:  That's not the problem! Why must I come all the way to this inn just to--
Momiji:  You're saying that, but you just really want to sleep in the same room as Tohru, don't you?

Hatori:  But Akito still doesn't know. If there is someone that hurt someone else, then there is always someone that can help them.
Shigure:  And that helpful someone gives hope and courage to the one that is hurt. Tohru is that helpful someone, isn't she? Tohru is very cute too, you know?
Hatori: When you say that, it doesn't really sound right.

Yuki:  There was always something that I wanted: friends I could depend on. Things that I could never forget, a home that I could go back to, a place where everyone laughs and smiles, to be a person who can keep his friends. Warm places, warm people... they are real.

Shigure:  Hey! They finally came... back?
Yuki:  [Holding snake Ayame] Peel his skin off and burn him until he dies. Right now.
Shigure:  Ah... Aya? Hey Aya! Long time no see!
Yuki:  Peel his skin off now!

Shigure:  Aya, Hatori and I went to the same elementary, junior high, and high school. And the three of us formed a "Super Handsome Blossom Trio."
Tohru:  Really?! Wow, that's amazing!
Kyou:  What the hell is "Super Handsome Blossom Trio"...?
Yuki:  I can just imagine Hatori's suffering.

Ayame:  Haven't seen you since New Year's, Gure-san!
Shigure:  It's been a while!
Ayame:  Were you cheating on me while I was gone, Gure-san?
Shigure:  How could I do such a thing when I have a guy like you, Aya?

Ayame:  I see, I see. Aren't you what they call a princess?
Tohru:  ...Wh...What?
Ayame:  The one beautiful flower among the wild and boring men. You're a kidnapped princess, am I right?
Shigure:  She's not actually kidnapped, though.

Kyou:  Huh? Hiro, what are you doing in a place like this?
Hiro:  Oh? Are you saying I need to be doing something? Are you saying I need to be working? Are you trying to say an unproductive person's life is not worth living?
Kyou:  I never asked you anything like that. I asked you a straight question, so give me a straight answer!
Hiro:  So what? Are you saying I need to answer any straight question you give me? Do I have to answer even if I don't want to?
Kyou:  Why you arrogant kid. You're really testing my patience!

[Hiro stole Tohru's notebook]
Kyou:  Hiro! What did you do?
Hiro:  Hah? What is this? Are you accusing me of something? What if I'm innocent, how are you gonna apologize?
Kyou:  Erk..
Hiro:  I only took her notebook.
Kyou:  So you did do it, you jackass!!

Momiji:  I guess in the end the end, Tohru was his rival for love!
Tohru:  I don't know if I should feel happy or sorry.
Momiji:  Tohru is in a difficult position!
Kyou:  Hah?

Shigure:  By the way, Ri-chan, why did you come?
Ritsu:  I'm sorry, did I interrupt you by coming?!
Shigure:  Yep.
Ritsu:  AHHHH!! I AM SO SORRY!!
Shigure:  It's a joke, a joke.

[Shigure is talking to Hatori on the phone]
Shigure:  So come over to take a look at Tohru-kun's cut.
Hatori:  I will come in the evening.
Shigure:  What? I didn't know you would accept my favor so easily. Do you secretly admire Tohru-kun by any chance?
Hatori:  . . .
Shigure:  So it's true?! Oh no, I'm so deeply shocked!!
Hatori:  I couldn't say a word because I was amazed at your stupidity.

[Tohru is preparing a meal and gives Hatori a taste]
Tohru:  How's the salt seasoning? Is it too salty?
Hatori:  No, it tastes good.
Tohru:  That's a relief.
Shigure:  Ufufu! Isn't she just great? I know you're feeling envious! My cute wife!
Tohru:  Ehh?!
Hatori:  If you don't stop saying such absurd things...
Kyou:  I'll bust you up!!
Shigure:  Oh, you were here?
Kyou:  Who's the cute wife of WHO?! If you don't shut your dumb mouth, I'll break your neck!!
Shigure:  Wah~ Kyou is scary~
Tohru:  Good morning, Kyou-kun.
Kyou:  You should at least act a little unpleasant! That's why that stupid Shigure dog keeps blabbering on and on!
Hatori:  It's shameful to yell so much out of jealousy.
Kyou:  Wha--It's not that! Why are you still here, Hatori?!

[Kyou opens the refrigerator]
Kyou:  Ah man, we're out of milk.
Tohru:  I'm sorry, I forgot about it. I'll immediately go and buy some.
Kyou:  Wait wait, you don't need to do that.
Tohru:  No, no, I need to be responsible since I'm taking care of the household.
Ritsu:  EYAAAAAA!! No, I'm sorry! It's not your fault! I wanted to eat cereal for breakfast so Tohru-san poured Kyou-san's milk into my bowl!! I am the guilty one! I am the wicked criminal!!! Please, go ahead and punish me! PUNISH ME!!

Yuki:  Good morning.
Tohru:  Ah, Yuki-kun, good morning.
Shigure:  Yuki-kun, you overslept~!
Ritsu:  KYAAAA! No!! I apologize for not waking you up early!! I'm sorry for making you late for school!!
Yuki:  Here we go again.
Ritsu:  I apologize for causing you to be suspended, for being tardy, and even for being expelled from your school!!

Shigure:  See! Justice always wins!
Kyou:  Who are you calling justice?
Yuki:  Shigure is evil in a way, too...

Tohru:  We're searching for a reason of existence. With our own strength, because maybe the truth is that there's no reason for life from the very beginning. Everyone hopes and tries so hard to find a reason of existence. The reason of birth, of staying with someone, of existence, believing we have to find them all with our own hands. Like finding a place for ourselves in dreams, in jobs, in people. The reasons we conclude may be indefinite and fragile. We may lose it too, but even so, we want a reason. As long as I'm alive, I want it too. If possible, I want to find a reason of existence within a person, within someone.

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